i dream of sunny days spent in the warming chill of midwest autumn air,
absorbing the constant buzz of everyday.
getting lost, just so we can explore our way back home.
i'm an idealist.
i've always known i was to be surrounded by the beautiful things--art, music, people.
a simple life in the midst of complication.
humbled by people who are smarter than me, though there can't be many!
a little less ordinary, and yet familiar in every way.
safe. unfathomably happy.
then, with one thoughtless remark, the dream is gone.
the dream becomes only a dream, and my reality is a disappointing one.
there are no more good mornings,
just anxious, sleepless nights
and days spent in a haze, hoping for an escape.
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